You know the game Name That Tune? Two players are given a clue and start bidding on how many notes they need to hear to name the song. The first player chooses a number (I can name that tune in 8 notes!) and the next player thinks seriously before choosing a number smaller than that. Eventually one player will contemplate his song-choosing abilities and decide to tell the other player to, "Name that tune!" The correct number of notes is played and we find out whether or not the last player to bid is as good as he professes himself to be. Pretty basic.
Sometimes changing diapers can be a little tedious and disgusting. Actually, it's always tedious and disgusting. Without really thinking about it I came up with a mental game to play while I go about the task. It's similar to Name That Tune, but I call it Change That Diaper. After opening my child's offensive diaper I survey the damage and think, "I can change that poopy with [x number] of wipes." I try to keep it to 3 or less, depending on the severity of the diaper. Then I go to work and see if I'm as good as I think I am. When I'm really feeling skilled I'll make my wipes bid based on what I smell rather than what I see. I'm quite the daredevil that way. The only prize at the end is a tightly wrapped diaper, but it gives me something to do to stave off the monotony.
I have not suggested playing this game to my husband. I know exactly how it would play out each and every time.
Husband: The baby's poopy. I can change that diaper with 3 wipes.
Me: [pause for dramatic effect] Change that diaper!
Husband: The baby's poopy. I can change that diaper with 5 wipes.
Me: [pause for dramatic effect] Change that diaper!
Husband: The baby's poopy. I can change that diaper with 8 wipes.
Me: [pause for dramatic effect] Change that diaper!
My response would be the same if the challenge was 200 wipes. I'm happy to let anyone else change that diaper!
3 comments:
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA.
you are awesome.
Ah, ha, Now that I'm on to your nefarious plan I can devise something equally clever... Well probably not, but I'll let you start off the bidding on the wipes from now on.
I totally do this.
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